08.27.08
1 Month Without Logan
Today is August 27th . . . it’s been one month since Logan left us. Sometimes it feels like it was just yesterday that we were sitting in the NSCU, holding Logan’s hand and talking story with all of his nurses . . . other times, it feels like it’s been forever since the last time we patted his back or rubbed his forehead. Lance & I can’t believe that we’ve managed to survive a month without our precious baby . . . on the day that Logan left us, we were sure that we couldn’t live without him.
The pain is still raw and the hole in our hearts is still enormous . . . we miss Logan tremendously and would do anything to bring him back, but we know that can’t ever happen. We talk to Logan every day and ask him to help us survive one more day without him.
We’re slowly trying to get back into a routine . . . Lance is back at work this week, although he’s working from home. I’m planning to go back to school next week since Lance will be back at the office. Lance worries about me being home alone . . . I must admit that I worry about being home alone too. There are times when the pain is so great . . . those are the times that we are so grateful to have each other to lean on.
We want to thank everyone for the phone calls, emails, blog comments, etc. You’ll never know how much we cherish talking to family & friends and reading all your comforting messages. We could never have gotten through this past month without all of your love and support.
Along with missing Logan, we’re also missing our big guy, Beamer. When we go outside to play with Koko & Irwin, Beamer’s absence is huge . . . playtime was his FAVORITE time so not having him there is so strange. Feeding time also makes us miss Beamer . . . putting food into 2 bowls, instead of 3, takes some getting used to.
Knowing that our big guy is protecting our tiny guy, and that they’re keeping each other company, helps to ease the pain a little . . . one day at a time . . . that’s all we can do.