08.13.08
Posted in Logan at 5:46 pm by kimi
Several people have asked us about how to donate money to Kapiolani’s NSCU (Newborn Special Care Unit) and/or the Ronald McDonald House. Here’s the info . . .
Kapiolani’s NSCU:
Make checks payable to:
Kapiolani Health Foundation
** on the memo line (or attach a note to your check), please write “In Memory of Logan Shinsato for the Newborn Special Care Unit”
You can mail your checks to:
Kapiolani Health Foundation
55 Merchant St., 26th Floor
Honolulu, HI 96813
If you’d like to use your credit card, you can also make an online donation by clicking on the link below . . .
http://tinyurl.com/5gahk2
** in the “Designation” section, select Kapiolani Medical Center for Women and Children
** in the “Comments” section, please write “In Memory of Logan Shinsato for the Newborn Special Care Unit”
Ronald McDonald House Charities of Hawaii:
If you’d like to donate money to the Ronald McDonald Charities, here’s a link to their site . . .
They also have a wish list, but we’re still trying to find out where you can drop off your donations . . .
FYI . . . when you make a donation to the NSCU in memory of Logan, Kapiolani sends us a letter to let us know about it. 
Thanks so much for the continued love & support you’ve all shown to us.
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08.12.08
Posted in Dogs at 3:41 pm by kimi
Today was another sad day for us . . . we had to put our big giant, Beamer, to sleep today. As most of you know, Beamer has been very sick since Friday evening. He remained a mystery to the vets because they couldn’t seem to figure out what was wrong with him. His lab tests on Sunday evening showed that his kidneys were starting to fail. They repeated the bloodwork again on Monday . . . his kidneys hadn’t gotten any better or worse, but his liver was also starting to show signs of failure.
The worst news came late last night . . . we got a call from the vet saying that Beamer had lymphoma. They suspected that he had an aggressive form of cancer and that it had already spread to his kidneys and liver. They offered chemotherapy, but didn’t have much hope that it would buy him much quality time.
For those of you who knew Beamer, he was a very playful and active dog . . . he wasn’t one who was content to just lay at your feet and enjoy your company. Seeing him lying there in the hospital’s kennel was hard for us . . . we knew that he was miserable, although the vets said that he probably wasn’t in any physical pain.
When we went to see him today, we took Koko and Irwin with us. They both seemed to know that something was very wrong with Beamer. Irwin was excited to see his buddy, but seemed to sense what was going on. He seemed very worried about me and Lance because we were both crying.
We said our goodbyes and gave him hugs and kisses . . . we told him that Logan was waiting for him. Dr. Hatami (our vet) gave him a sedative to ease him through it. She then administered the final injection . . . within seconds, our beautiful golden was gone. He went very peacefully, with his family by his side.
They say that every boy needs a dog . . . Logan has a buddy now. We think that Logan’s job was just too big for a little guy like him to do alone, so he chose the biggest guy to come and help him. We take comfort knowing that Logan and Beamer are together now, and that they’ll keep each other company until we can see them both again. Now we’ll have two babies to look for in our dreams.
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08.09.08
Posted in Logan at 11:26 pm by lance
Just a quick note to say thank you to everyone who helped us celebrate Logan’s life…
We could feel the love and positive energies that you all shared with us.
We think Logan would have loved everything about tonight. We definitely felt his presence there.
Thank you again.
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Posted in Dogs at 11:23 pm by lance
We just got home from checking on Beamer… As Logan’s celebration was wrapping up, Kim got a call from the Vet letting us know that Beamer was not doing too well. During the evening, Beamer threw up blood 3 times and had diarrhea with blood in it also. The vet also said that the insulin they were giving him for his high glucose levels was not helping.
When we got to the vet’s office, Beamer looked a little better than when we had left him this afternoon. He was actually upright as he was lying down… as opposed to lying on his side. He was still very weak, though, and couldn’t stand or hold his head up for too long.
The vet went over the options with us… which included doing an exploratory surgery. Since they wouldn’t be able to do the surgery until late tomorrow afternoon anyway, we opted to have them run a barium series tonight. For this test, Beamer will drink – or they’ll put a tube down his throat – a solution that will help the vet see his gastro-intestinal (GI) system with x-rays. They will run a series of x-rays to track the solution as it moves through the GI system. We should have the results tomorrow morning.
Keep your fingers crossed that they find something.
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Posted in Dogs at 2:48 am by lance
On Friday afternoon, I went out to feed the dogs. While I was getting ready to put the dog bowls down, Beamer barfed in the kennel… YUCK! After barfing, he walked out of the kennel and barfed again… double YUCK! I cleaned up the barf and fed the dogs. Koko and Irwin scarfed their food, as usual, but Beamer just sniffed his food so I took it away. Other than that, he seemed okay. This wasn’t the first time that he had barfed, or the first time that he refused to eat, so we didn’t think much of it.
We went out to Wahiawa to watch the Olympic opening ceremony and didn’t get home until late Friday night. When we got home, only Koko and Irwin greeted us at the door. We figured that Beamer was around somewhere so I went to get their food ready. As I was opening the sliding door, I noticed that Beamer was still MIA… then I saw him lying by the gate. This was really not like Beamer at all… he’s usually waiting at the sliding door, ready to play.
We put Koko and Irwin in the kennel and went to check on Beamer, who was still just lying there, looking at us. Again, this was very strange behavior for Beamer. We called him over to us and it took him awhile to get up… it took a lot of coaxing to get him to walk over to us. He was very lethargic, but seemed to be walking alright… maybe a little bit wobbly.
Pearl City Veterinary Clinic (where we usually take our dogs) just merged with VCA Family Animal Hospital… luckily, VCA offers 24-hour vet services so we decided to give them a call. We made the decision to take him into the clinic because he REALLY didn’t seem like himself. We’re usually not ones to over-react when it comes to our dogs, so needless to say, we were pretty worried about the big guy.
Long story short… the vet ran some bloodwork on Beamer and found a few abnormalities. They felt it was best to keep him overnight and run more tests on him. We asked if we could see him before we left and they told us they would bring him out to see us. We waited for awhile in the waiting room… eventually, a vet tech came out to get us. Apparently, Beamer wasn’t feeling well enough to get up and make the trip so we went in the back to see him. Talk about a SAD sight… our big guy was just laying in the kennel with his head resting on his paws. He had just enough energy to lift his head when we opened the kennel gate… he didn’t even wag his tail for us. 
We’re crossing our fingers that everything will turn out OK for Beamer… Irwin was very disturbed that Beamer didn’t come home with us. He was even more concerned when I locked them up in the kennel for bedtime… he kept looking towards the gate, trying to find his buddy.
We know that Logan is looking out for Beamer!
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08.08.08
Posted in Logan at 6:19 pm by lance
We just wanted to remind everyone that Logan’s celebration will be tomorrow (Saturday, August 9th).
Please join us for…
A Celebration of Logan’s Life
Saturday, August 9th
Mililani Mortuary – Mauka Chapel (map to chapel)
5:30pm – Visitation
6:30pm – Celebration Begins
This will not be a funeral or a memorial service, so please try not to wear dark colors.
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08.06.08
Posted in Logan at 4:33 pm by kimi
For those who haven’t seen it yet, Logan’s obituary came out today in both local papers… The one in the Honolulu Star-Bulletin had a typo, so I think they’re going to reprint it tomorrow. Will post the corrected one when it comes out…
Honolulu Advertiser
Here’s the corrected one…
Honolulu Star-Bulletin
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Posted in Logan at 9:34 am by kimi
Since Logan left us last Sunday, Lance & I have already visited the NSCU 3 times. The first visit was on Monday, the day after Logan left us. When we woke up that morning, our initial thought was that Sunday had all just been a horrible nightmare . . . once reality hit us, we realized that we had no reason to get up & go to the hospital. Going to the hospital to visit Logan had been a part of our daily routine for 8 weeks . . . we felt lost, knowing that Logan wasn’t waiting for us.
Although we knew it would be hard to go back, we made the decision to visit the NSCU. The NSCU was Logan’s home . . . the only one he ever knew. All of our memories of Logan are centered around the NSCU . . . we knew that our connection to him would be strongest there.
Going back to the NSCU sort of felt like going home . . . as we walked through the door, we were greeted by familiar faces & familiar sounds. Many nurses, doctors, and NSCU staff were there, ready with hugs & tears for us. These wonderful people were Logan’s family for the 8 weeks that he was with us . . . because they were Logan’s family, they became our family too. As we hugged each of them, we realized that by losing Logan, we also felt like we were losing a part of our family . . . although we can’t bring Logan back, we were happy to know that we could hold onto our NSCU family.
Waynell, the NSCU social worker, brought 2 chairs to Logan’s empty bedside. She pulled a screen around us to give us some privacy & allowed us to sit at his bedside for as long as we wanted. We sat there for a while, listening to all of the familiar sounds . . . after spending 8 weeks there, we knew what every sound meant! Sitting at his empty bedside was difficult, but it helped us to accept that Logan was no longer with us.
By our next visit, Logan’s bedside had already been filled with a new baby. One of Logan’s nurses said that the NSCU is like Vegas . . . it’s open 24/7 & it’s always changing . . . you see something new every time you visit. Although it was hard to see someone else in Logan’s “home”, it showed us that life goes on, especially in the NSCU.
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08.05.08
Posted in Logan at 10:44 pm by lance
On our last visit back to the NSCU on Sunday, Kim and I were talking to some of the nurses and found out that a company had donated a few blue Zakys. At first they thought that we had forgotten to take Logan’s one home, but then they realized that it was not his and there was actually more than one floating around. There was a little label on each Zaky saying, “Compliments of Ovation Pharmaceuticals.”
We thought that it was a little odd that just after Logan leaves us, these Zakys – and only blue Zakys… just like Logan’s – show up in the NSCU. We had several theories on how Ovation could be connected to Logan, but none of them panned out… Guess it’s just a coincidence, but we like to think that it’s Logan working his magic… 
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08.01.08
Posted in Logan at 10:01 am by kimi
On Wednesday, Lance & I went to see our sweet baby Logan for the last time. The mortuary needed someone to identify Logan’s body before cremation. We didn’t know if we would be strong enough to do this ourselves . . . we had no idea what his body would look like, or how it would feel. We envisioned a morgue (like the ones you see on TV), with our precious baby lying on a cold steel table . . . this was an image we couldn’t bear to see.
We thought about asking someone else to do the ID for us, but once again, we could feel Logan giving us strength. We realized that we wanted to give one last gift to Logan . . . sending him off on his journey, just perfect.  No one knew Logan the way that we did, so no one could do this for Logan except us. We asked my dad to drive us there and be our backup, just in case.
I know that we’ll never have “closure”, but I needed to see my sweet baby one last time to make this whole situation real. The day after he left us, we woke up hoping that this was all just a terrible nightmare. But when we went back to the NSCU and sat at his empty bedside, we realized that he was really gone. Just like seeing his empty bedside, we knew that seeing Logan’s body at the mortuary would also help us to accept that he has left us.
As we walked into the room, we could feel Logan’s presence . . . we could feel him filling us with all of his strength.  A small table had been placed in the center of the room, covered with a white cloth. Logan was lying on a small, white pillow, with a blue blanket tucked up to his chin . . . he looked like he was in bed, fast asleep. He was dressed in the outfit that we had chosen for him . . . a knitted cap and booties from the hospital and a preemie-sized onesie that I had bought for him. He was wrapped snugly in a blue blanket with a white knitted trim. He looked so peaceful.
We unwrapped the blanket so that we could see him in his “big boy” clothes . . . we were surprised that his onesie actually fit him! When Logan was born, we were each given an ID bracelet with a matching code . . . we would need this bracelet when we brought him home. We made sure to put Logan’s ID bracelet on his ankle – to keep his hands free so that he could touch his face – so that we could properly bring him home.
We gave his Zaky a few last hugs and kisses before giving it back to Logan. We placed it on his tummy, with Zaky’s fingers touching his face . . . exactly the way he always liked it. We tucked his pacifier – his other best friend – close to his heart and wrapped him up in the blanket. For extra warmth and security, we snuggled him and wrapped him in a second blanket . . . the one that I had wanted to bring him home in.
As we snuggled our baby for the last time, we were torn . . . it was so unfair that this would be the last time that we could ever cuddle our baby, but yet, he looked so peaceful. We had never seen him this content before. Looking at his precious face, we knew that letting him go was the right decision.
Looking back on that day, we are so thankful that Logan gave us the strength to see him off. When we last saw him on Sunday, his body was so traumatized by his massive infection. Holding him for the last time, Logan was so cuddly and soft . . . a much better memory for our one last hug goodbye.
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